Relentless; random words

Yes, it’s dark.

Its madness, she says. I say no, that is why I left her. Madness is as madness does, am I not sane?

Am I not here, here, its not hot anymore, it’s now cold. Cold as snow in the hands of a sweaty traveler. Cold and white, white not red. Breezy not windy, not bloody, not insane. I left her; she’s now behind me, not in front. In front is a statue, a rock figure, looking at me, yes me, approving yet judging; why did I come so late? Where did I come from?

I came here, late but here. Here there are people. They are nice and always smiling. They talk to me when I talk to them. They smile  when I smile. Here there are books, there is reading. I read, I talk I walk. I drink, the drink of life. I try to let it all in.

This is relentless; I hear it all day, all night. The night, it is indeed cold, it is surprising. There are drugs, dreams, spells, spell-bound at her beauty. I want to have her, I want to keep her, but she has left me, I am behind her.

Maybe this is madness? I do not know. I feel yet do not feel. I am always ready. Ready to talk. Here people do not want to fight me. They mostly agree. I disagree with few. On the whole I disagree with many and probably all. I do not want to fight but I will. I will wage a war for my ideas. I am not insane, I have never felt sane; my words are ideas without strings. Strings on a guitar that refuses to play. I do not want to fight you but I may have to. 

You are standing in my way, I want to make you move, but I will not push you. I do not want to have blood on my hands. I want this snow to stay white.

This is relentless, it never stops. I stare at the abyss and the abyss refuses to stare back at me. This is madness she says, so I left her. I left her behind. But this has to stop. I need to stop it. It is too many words; I will stop it. I will stop this madness. I will find the end.

There, I have stopped. I am silent.